25+ Funny Birthday Wish Messages for Friends & Family

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It takes great skill to be funny. It’s harder to make people laugh than cry. That’s why there should be two Best Picture categories for the Academy Awards. One should be “Best Picture - Drama,” and the other should be “Best Picture - Comedy.” 

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If you’re reading this article, you’re probably in search of funny ways to say “Happy Birthday” to a friend or family member. You probably intend to extend these wishes through text or social media. Here are some things to consider in your search for the perfect one-liner.

First, you have to know your audience. While you may think your mild insults are funny, your audience may see them as offensive or rude.

Second, sending funny birthday messages through text or social media takes great skill because you have to depend upon the receiver’s ability to read with a sense of timing. Not everyone has this ability.

Finally, not everyone has a great sense of humor. You know who those people are in your life. Don’t waste your best lines on someone without a funny bone.

Funny Birthday Wishes for a Best Friend

It should be easier to be funny with a best friend. You probably have a lot of shared experiences to draw from when coming up with a birthday message.

You know each other’s idiosyncrasies, and what they find amusing. And since you get to pick your best friend, why would you have chosen one without a great sense of humor?

1. It is your birthday.

Fans of “The Office” will recognize this banner that Dwight hung to celebrate a birthday of a co-worker. You may want to alter the message a bit so it is written in true Dwight style. Write “Fact: It is your birthday.”

Of course, if your friend is not a fan of The Office, this message will fall flat.

2. Now that you are turning 40, you may want to work on your birthday resolutions. Of course, our resolutions would be the same: 1) Leave the house after dark at least once a month. 2) Socialize more with creatures that are not dogs. 3. Eat more cake. 

If you and your friend have similar lifestyles, celebrate it. Who cares if you are less of a party animal and your birthday resolutions reflect your habits?

3. I remembered your birthday without Facebook! Yay me!

Of course, if you post this message on your friend’s Facebook page, he or she will question if you really did remember.

4. I didn’t forget your birthday. You’re just old and confused.

Send this message to your friend if you forgot her birthday. And then apologize.

5. Don’t sweat turning 50! After all, nobody likes a sweaty senior citizen.

Of course, this wish could be customizable for anyone turning older than 40. 

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Funny Birthday Wishes for a Parent

If you have a great sense of humor, maybe you got it from one of your parents. Here are some sample messages to send to your mom or dad who is celebrating a birthday.

6. Happy birthday from your favorite child.

This message could work whether you are an only child or one of nine. The message would be particularly funny if you caused many of your parent’s gray hairs.

7. Happy birthday from your favorite financial burden.

Are you a college student or a teenager? This would be the appropriate thing to say to your dad on his birthday.

8. Happy birthday, dad! And thanks for the genetics that gave me these fantastic good looks. 

Who said you have to be humble when sending a birthday message to your dad?

9. Happy birthday, mom! May we continue to drive each other crazy for years to come!

You might as well laugh about it. Our moms sometimes drive us crazy.

10. Happy birthday, mom (or dad)! Don’t let your old age get you down. You’ll have a hard time getting back up.

Old age jokes never go out of style.

Funny Birthday Wishes for a Child, Son, or Daughter

It’s not only kids who are smart-alecks to their parents. Parents can offer sarcastic, funny birthday wishes as well. Here are a few somewhat-funny things to text to your son or daughter on his or her birthday.

11. Happy birthday to my daughter, who is smart, beautiful, funny, and reminds me a lot of myself. 

Can’t you see your daughter rolling her eyes when she receives this message?

12. Happy birthday to the son who has the best mother in the world.

If your son acknowledges the comment, assume that he agrees that you are, indeed, the best mother in the world.

13. Daughter, I hope you have a happy birthday. I’ll just try to ignore the fact that I did all the work on this day 24 years ago so you could go out with your friends for margaritas tonight.

Aren’t birthdays weird? Kids should give their mothers gifts on their birthday.

14. Happy birthday to my son! You were a delightful baby, and you have grown into a wonderful man. Those teen years I could have done without.

Somehow parents survive having teenage sons. They may have more wrinkles at the end of those years, but they survive.

15. Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without receiving a Facebook reminder. 

Let’s hope you can remember your child’s birthday. 

Funny Birthday Wishes for a Spouse or Partner

Your spouse has to get your sense of humor. They picked you as a partner! Raz your spouse or partner as you celebrate his or her birthday.

16. I was planning on getting you something amazing and memorable for your birthday, but then I remembered that you already have me in your life. 

Sometimes your spouse needs reminding how lucky he is. Use his birthday to remind him.

17. May your day be more beautiful than a unicorn farting rainbows.

Can you think of anything more beautiful than that? 

18. Let’s forget about the mistakes of the past. Let’s forget about the future as well, since we can’t predict it. Let’s also forget about the present—because I didn’t get you one.

It’s hard to think of what to give your spouse as a present every darn year. 

19. Happy birthday! And sorry you have to scroll so far down on websites to find your birth year. 

Of course, this sentiment doesn’t work if you are older than your partner.

20. The Senility Prayer: God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

There are plenty of poems about aging that would make great birthday greetings for your spouse or partner. 

Funny Birthday Wishes for a Sibling

Hopefully, you are lucky enough to be able to offer somewhat rude birthday wishes to your brother or sister. This is a sign of a close relationship. Here are some obnoxious wishes to share with your brother or sister.

16. Happy birthday to Mom and Dad’s second-favorite son. 

Of course, this message can be personalized to fit the occasion. 

17. The older you get, the better you get—unless you’re a cookie.

Sometimes the funniest messages are those that mix a life lesson with an unexpected punchline. 

18. Even if you weren’t my only sister, you would still be my favorite. Probably.

Tell your sister you’re “just being honest.”

19. Happy birthday to my little brother, who is hardly ever annoying anymore. 

Maybe it took three decades for your brother to get less annoying, but who’s counting?

20. Who needs a birthday present when you have a sister like me?

You probably didn’t buy anything for your sister anyway, did you?

Wishing Them the Best

Are there times when you struggle to find the perfect words? Maybe you want to find the ideal zinger to insult your brother on his birthday. We hope we helped you come up with a few. After slightly insulting the ones you love, make sure you also take the time to tell them how much you care. 

While it is fun to get a laugh by coming up with the perfect line, there are times when the stakes may be higher. Maybe you need to figure out the right thing to say to a person who recently received a cancer diagnosis. Perhaps you’re searching for the right words to honor a deceased loved one on their birthday. Or how to offer condolences to someone who lost a spouse or a child. 

Unfortunately, sometimes there are no appropriate words. Admit this. Hug the person if you can’t think of anything to say.

No matter the situation, it is important to speak from the heart. A person would prefer hearing a sentiment that comes directly from you instead of one that you read on the front of a greeting card.

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