If someone in your life is going through a hard time, you might want to quickly check-in to see how they’re doing. Sending a brief email, direct message, or text to let them know you’re thinking about them can help them feel supported and loved.
Jump ahead to these sections:
- How to Politely Say ‘Just Checking In’ in a Formal Email
- ‘Just Checking In to See How You’re Doing’ Messages for a Friend or Family Member
- How to Say ‘Just Checking In On You’ After the Recipient Experienced a Loss or Tragedy
If you’re not sure how to word your “just checking in” email or message, whether it’s to a work acquaintance or a close friend, the ideas below can help you get started.
Tip: If you're "just checking in" on a family member or friend because they recently lost someone, our post-loss checklist might be worth sharing.
How to Politely Say ‘Just Checking In’ in a Formal Email
You don’t have to be someone’s best friend or family member to check in on them if you know they’re struggling.
If you know your co-worker, manager, or client has lost someone or is going through a rough patch, you can send a polite check-in message. It’s best to do so in an email, and it’s a good idea to word your note more formally.
Here are some ideas for messages you can include in a formal check-in email.
1. I wanted to see how everything is going.
Sometimes the best way to say “just checking in” is to just come out and say it. In a polite or formal email, it’s often a good idea to let the person know the purpose of the message right away. Don’t pressure them to respond, but just give them the information that you’d like to know how they’re doing.
2. This made me think of you.
In a professional context, you can send a client or co-worker a link to an article that reminds you of them. If it was an article that made you think of checking in with that person, this message could be a good choice.
3. Let’s catch up soon.
If you haven’t spoken to the person in a while, it’s a kind gesture to offer to talk with them on the phone or just via email. Let them know when you’re available to talk, or just let them know they can reach out at any time.
4. I wanted to see how I could help.
When someone is going through a hard time, it affects every corner of their life. Even as a professional acquaintance, there may be something you can do to help. Offering to do so is a great way to reach out and check-in with a professional tone.
5. I would love to talk about the project you’re working on.
If you know what the person’s been working on lately, you can check in by asking about that specific thing. Even if they’ve been off work because of an illness or loss, they might be happy to jump back into work for a quick conversation.
6. Take as much time as you need.
If you had plans to get together with the person, and they had to cancel, you can check in to let them know there’s no rush. This can often come as a major relief to someone who’s suffering from stress in addition to illness or grief.
‘Just Checking In to See How You’re Doing’ Messages for a Friend or Family Member
Checking in on a friend or family member can be more personal and informal. Your friend might have lost someone close to them, or they might be stuck at home sick. You can even send a checking-in message just because you haven’t heard from someone in a while.
If you want to check in on a friend or family member, you can send them a brief and casual check-in message to let them know you’re thinking about them.
Here are some messages that will help you say, “Just checking in to see how you’re doing,” to a friend or family member.
7. I’ve been missing you and wanted to say hi.
If it’s been a while since you’ve seen your friend or family member, you can let them know you miss talking to them and just wanted to say hello.
8. Hey, how are you doing?
Sometimes, just asking how someone is (sincerely) is a meaningful gesture. The person might be waiting for someone to genuinely ask how they’re doing so that they can do a little venting.
It also shows that you actually care about how they are, and you’re interested in their well-being.
9. I was just thinking of you and wanted to say hi.
Whenever you happen to think of someone you haven’t spoken to in a while, you can reach out quickly via text or DM to let them know. They might respond or not, but you’ve let them know they’re in your thoughts.
10. I’d love to catch up on what you’ve been doing!
You can send an enthusiastic message requesting further conversation if you’re willing to spend some extra time checking in on a friend.
11. I wanted to see if everything is OK.
If you feel like your friend or family member might be in some emotional distress, and the two of you are fairly close, you can let them know you’re concerned with this type of message. It lets them know that you’ve noticed a change in their behavior, and you’re there to support them if they need help.
12. You’re in my thoughts and prayers.
If you pray for your friend’s well-being, you might let them know they’re in your thoughts and prayers. Some people don’t respond well to religious sentiments, however, so it’s important to keep the specific recipient in mind.
How to Say ‘Just Checking In On You’ After the Recipient Experienced a Loss or Tragedy
One of the most helpful times to check in on someone is after they experience a loss or tragedy. If you know someone who’s struggling through feelings of grief, you can help by reaching out with just a few words. Letting them know you’re there if they need to talk can make all the difference.
Here are some different ways you can say, “Just checking in on you,” to someone who’s experienced a loss or tragedy.
13. Please let me know if I can help in any way.
Reaching out to check-in is often enough to lift someone’s spirits after they’ve experienced a loss or tragedy. But you can go one step further by offering to help in any way you can.
14. I’m so sorry to hear about ___. I wanted you to know I’m thinking of you.
A message like this one doesn’t put any stress on the recipient to respond to the condolences in any timely way. It just briefly lets them know that they’re in your thoughts, which can go a long way in lifting their spirits.
15. I know you’re having a hard time, and I’m here if you want to talk.
You can check in on a friend or family member and let them know you’re there for them when they’re ready with this message. Even if they can’t meet up with you any time soon, they’ll know you’re available when they want to go out or just chat on the phone.
16. Sending you positive vibes.
If you’re wishing all the best for a grieving friend or family member, you can let them know you’re sending them good energy. Just hearing or reading those words could be enough for the recipient to start feeling a little bit better, if only for a moment.
17. I’m so sorry for your loss. I just wanted to share my condolences and check in on you.
If someone you know has just experienced the death of a loved one, you can check in on them and say “sorry for your loss” at the same time. This lets the person know you’re thinking of them and that you understand they’re having a hard time.
18. Just a quick reminder that you’re loved.
We can all use regular reminders that we’re loved and cared for, even when we’re not grieving a loss or experiencing a tragedy. Your friend or family member who’s going through a hard time will appreciate that kind of reminder.
Just Checking In
Checking in on someone you care about—whether they’re an acquaintance or someone you’ve been close with for years—is a kind gesture that goes a long way.
Sometimes, all it takes is a few words, letting the person know they’re in your thoughts, to brighten that person’s day. By checking in on the people in your life, you also strengthen your bonds and your support circle for when you need a helping hand.
No matter who you’re checking in on or why, it often takes just a simple email, text message, or DM to make all the difference.