15 ‘Open When’ Letter Ideas to Send Your Boyfriend


How do you connect with loved ones when you’re separated by distance? One idea is an "open when" letter. These are letters specifically designed to be opened on special occasions. Creating "open when" letters for your boyfriend is a great option if you’re in a long-distance relationship or if you’re apart for any reason.

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An open when letter bridges the gaps between time and distance. It’s a way to show you care even when you can’t be there. Though technology makes it easier to feel close, there’s something special and romantic about the act of writing a letter. 

If you’re looking to create your own "open when" letters, you’re in the right place. Here are our favorite "open when" letter ideas to send your boyfriend or significant other. 

How to Write an ‘Open When’ Letter to Your Boyfriend

Whether this is your first set of "open when" letters or you’re just not sure how to best care for someone from far away, these steps below will get you started. Remember, there are no set-in-stone rules when it comes to writing "open when" letters. It’s all about finding what works best for you and your boyfriend. 

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1. Create a list of topics

Your first step is to make a list of topic ideas. These are occasions or moments when your boyfriend should open their letter. They can be specific moods (for example, “open when you’re happy”) or occasions (like birthdays, holidays, etc).

There are no right or wrong options. Consider how long you and your partner will be separated. Will you miss any important moments or milestones? This is a great way to find topics for your "open when" letters. Need more ideas? Check out our full list below. 

2. Set a schedule

Your "open when" letters might also need a schedule. You can ask your boyfriend to open these letters any way that makes sense for you. The most common choices are:

  • Set timeframe: You might follow a specific timeframe. For example, he opens his letters every week or twice a week. 
  • Occasional: Alternatively, your letters can be opened on specific occasions. Make sure this is clear when sending your letters. 

3. Draft your letters

Before you write your final draft, it’s a good idea to brainstorm exactly what you’d like to write in each letter. You can do this on your computer, with bullet points, or however works best for you. 

Because you’ll want to make sure your message is as powerful as possible, you might even ask a trusted friend to review them for you. Avoid unnecessary mistakes and typos. However, this isn’t a formal assignment, and it’s OK if mistakes do happen with your "open when" letters. 

4. Gather supplies

When you’re ready to start writing, gather the right supplies. You’ll need:

  • Fancy stationery or printer paper
  • High-quality pens (if you’re handwriting)
  • Envelopes
  • A container, album, or box

You can either handwrite your letters or print them from your computer. No matter what you choose, make sure you put them in your envelopes securely and label each envelope. Last but not least, put everything in an easy-to-carry box, album, or container so they don’t get lost. 

5. Gift them to your boyfriend

Last but not least, give your "open when" letters to your boyfriend. You might gift these right before he leaves (or you leave). You could also mail them all at once for a special surprise. 

Once you’ve gifted them to your significant other, don’t forget to remind him to open them when appropriate. Ask for his thoughts with each letter, and use this as an opportunity to grow closer as a couple. 

‘Open When’ Letter Topic Ideas for Your Boyfriend

There are so many ways to use "open when" letters to share the love. These ideas below are perfect for connecting with your boyfriend no matter the occasion. 

1. ‘Open when you first unpack’

If you and your boyfriend are suddenly apart for any reason, an "open when" letter for when they first unpack is a good idea. Unpacking can be an emotional process, and this is when the initial feelings set in. 

Having something to open and find support is much-needed in these first moments. Remind your boyfriend that he is loved and missed, even right after he’s gone. 

2. ‘Open when you’re sick’

Knowing what to say when someone’s sick isn’t always easy, but your boyfriend will need your encouragement more than ever. 

If they’re not feeling their best, they could feel extra homesick or miss your companionship. Let them know that you’re always there for them, in sickness and in health. 

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3. ‘Open when you miss me’

It’s normal to miss your significant other when you’re apart. Though they can always call or text, this isn’t the same as being there in person.

An ‘open when you miss me’ letter is a powerful way to let them know that you’re always with them in spirit. You might share a funny joke or experience to lift their spirits, or just remind them that you’ll be together soon. 

4. ‘Open when you need a kiss’

That personal connection and affection is often missed the most when you’re apart. Being separated by distance means that it’s not possible to touch, hug, or kiss your boyfriend when you want to. 

This kind of "open when" letter is a cute and romantic way to be there for him. Though you might not be able to kiss in person, you can send one in spirit. 

5. ‘Open when we just got off the phone’

If you’re separated from your partner, odds are you talk on the phone often. When you hang up from a phone call, those feelings of sadness and loneliness easily creep in. 

An ‘open when we just got off the phone’ message gives them an extra dose of compassion when they need it most. 

6. ‘Open when you’re coming to see me’

While apart, you likely will visit each other a few times. A letter for when he’s on his way to see you is the perfect way to build excitement over your reunion. You can share some ideas for things you’ll do together, or just remind him how happy you are to see him. 

7. ‘Open when you’re feeling homesick’

Homesickness strikes at any age or period in our life. No matter what you’re going through, you can still experience homesickness. 

This is the perfect letter for reminding your boyfriend of home. Share your favorite memories and your favorite things. Remind him that he can always visit. 

8. ‘Open when it’s our anniversary’

Spending an anniversary apart is difficult. A romantic, thoughtful "open when" letter for your anniversary brings you closer together. Though distance might be in the way, you are still together in spirit. 

9. ‘Open when you’re worried we won’t make it’

Though this might be a difficult letter to write, it does happen. The reality of long distance or short-term separations is that sometimes people naturally drift apart. Strain and anger in the relationship can come up (which is why these letters can double as "open when you're mad at me" letters).

That being said, a few romantic words of wisdom can help ease your boyfriend’s worries. Words truly have the ability to bring us closer together. 

10. ‘Open when you need encouragement'

One of the best parts of having a partner is always having a cheerleader in your corner. Having a trusted significant other for support can get you through life’s most difficult challenges. This type of letter encourages your boyfriend to be his best. 

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Small Gifts Ideas for ‘Open When’ Letters for a Boyfriend

Your "open when" letter is even stronger when you pair it with a few small gifts. Here are some ideas to spark inspiration.

11. Tea or coffee

Tea or coffee can help energize your boyfriend, calm him down, or just give him a pick-me-up on a hard day. This is one of the best relaxation gifts.

12. Streaming gift card

Another idea to help you and your boyfriend grow closer is a streaming gift card. This lets the both of you watch TV and films on the go, no matter where you are. Movie nights just got better!

13. Candle

Candles are a powerful form of reflection. A small candle, when paired with an "open when" letter, is a way to remind your boyfriend that warmth can be found together. 

14. Postage and envelopes

Why not encourage your boyfriend to write back? Prepaid postage, envelopes, and stationery make it simple for him to send letters of his own. 

15. Photos

Last but not least, include some of your favorite photos. These can be photos of you, a pet, family, or the two of you together. If it puts a smile on his face, it’s a great idea. 

Example ‘Open When’ Letters for a Boyfriend

Because it’s often hard to find the right words to say, here are some "open when" letters that are perfect for sending to a boyfriend. Use these examples to start your own letters. 

Example for his birthday

Happy Birthday! I’m so sad that I can’t be with you today to celebrate your special day. I just wanted to remind you how much I love and support you. This day is all about you. Make it a celebration! Eat something sweet, take a bit of a break, and enjoy all of this ‘me time.’ I’m thinking of you! Love always. 

Example for when he is having a bad day

So you’re having a bad day. I’m sorry about that. I know how hard bad days can be. They always seem like they’re endless, but know that brighter days are always ahead. You’re the strongest person I know. I always count on you to be there for me, so I hope this letter can be there for you. You’re amazing and talented. It’s OK if this bad day gets you down, but get up and start again tomorrow. I’m always here for you. 

Create the Best ‘Open When’ Letters

An "open when" letter is an amazing way to show support. We can’t always be with the ones we love the most in person, but we can always show that we care. An "open when" letter is a special way to put in work in advance that pays off in the future. 

Have you created any "open when" letters? These ideas for your boyfriend are a great way to add romance into your life no matter where you are in the world. 

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